Gratitude

 

In North India, sex-selective abortion remains a grim reality, despite being illegal. The Pre-Conception and Pre-Natal Diagnostic Techniques (PCPNDT) Act was enacted in 1994 and began to be more strictly enforced by the late 1990s. 

I still remember vividly the time I went for an ultrasound during my pregnancy. The law had started gaining traction, and doctors were sternly warned not to reveal the sex of the fetus under any circumstances. Violators could face strict penalties or even lose their license to practice. But while the law was in place, people's attitudes—particularly within families and communities—were much slower to change.

My own experience was no different. My ex-husband and in-laws were adamant that I find out the sex of the fetus. Their obsession with having a male child was overpowering and merciless. On two previous occasions, they had forced me to undergo abortions when they managed to find out—through illegal means—that the fetus was female. The trauma of those experiences still lingers in my memory.

During my third pregnancy, I once again went for an ultrasound. This time, the woman technician conducting the ultrasonography maintained a strict professional stance in front of my ex-husband and his mother. She clearly told them that the law prohibited her from revealing the sex of the fetus, and she would not break it under any circumstances. Her firm refusal was remarkable, especially in a context where many still circumvent the rules.

But then, when she found a moment to speak to me alone, she gently said something that would stay with me forever. “I know what you’ve been going through,” she said softly. “That’s why I’m risking my profession to tell you—it’s a girl.”

I was stunned. I couldn’t find the words to thank her then. But in that moment, I made a quiet vow to myself: this time, I will protect my daughter at all costs.

Years have passed, and that little girl is growing up with strength and dignity. She’s here today because of that single act of courage and feminist solidarity—a small gesture that came from a stranger, but meant everything to me. 

At the time, I was too naïve, too overwhelmed, to return and express my gratitude. But as I reflect now, I am filled with a deep sense of appreciation for that woman who, despite the risks, chose empathy over silence.

I may never know where she is now, but wherever she may be, I want to thank her from the depths of my heart. Her act of kindness not only saved a life but also restored my own courage and determination.

It’s these simple, quiet acts of bravery and compassion that keep the world going. In a system designed to crush women, it was another woman who stood beside me, and that made all the difference.

Thank you for being there, for saving the life of my daughter, for helping me to restore my dignity.